asobouyo | ♥ Appointments Post ♥

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♥ appointment post

♥ Appointments Post ♥

This is a personal appointment post for anyone who wants to contact Elicia Hughes (

asobouyo ) without going to the trouble of setting up a log/journal; as I'll say with all my characters, if you have any reason to contact her at all, go right ahead here! Voice, Video, Written, or Action is completely acceptable. Just keep in mind that she's at school at certain times on weekdays (it's sketchy enough to say 'after school' or before or what have you)!

Please put the the month and the type of communication—i.e. [March 29th][Action], or anything in that sort of way—in the subject line (putting why you're there is totally optional; I'm sure I'll figure it out through the character eventually. |D).

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Good.... I'm okay...

[She nods. It's hesitant, because... well. An adult wouldn't know where to begin, let alone her. She has a lot of thoughts and none of them are easy to categorize in priority. She looks him in the eye, and there's definite disappointment. But she doesn't run away, or raise her voice. She's still very tired from the flip-flopping her emotions are throwing.]

... Did you really hurt people where you're from?

[She wants honestly, Mr. Loki. Even if you're a good liar sometimes.]

[Tony, come on in. Lead to her room? She's sitting at her small table looking at a pad of paper, making dots. She's not really, uh... sure what to draw, right now. Considering the whole 'hero' thing isn't panning out, and she's worried about her new friend, and everyone seems so serious, and she's still a little scared and hurt--

She looks up, but she knows Tony knows, so she closes her mouth and just frowns, waiting...]

... Are you here to take away my certificate?

[He knew this wasn't going to be easy.

But then she comes out of the starting gate with a question like that.

And suddenly, he feels impossibly tired.

He regards her with a sad, sorry kind of smile, before he steps over to her little table and takes a seat himself. The chair is small and he might look ridiculous, but he doesn't care.]

From what I hear, you were very brave today. If anything, that's earned you some extra stars.

[He sighs. He doesn't look so much sad as simply tired, and in that moment very old.]

I'm afraid that's true. In war, people often are hurt, and I led one side of a war.

Edited 2012-10-03 09:15 (UTC)

[She tries for a smile. It's the best she's got right now.]

I... um...

I was trying to make a card for Mr. Loki.

It's always bad and scary, when you get hurt, so...

...

I don't like war, Mr. Loki. I—... my papa fought in a war once, and it hurt him on the inside... and we fight here a lot, too, and they took me even though I didn't want to.

[She shivers a little, holding the flower, trying not to succumb to all the pent up little feelings she's kept at bay.]

I don't like it.

So... please don't fight here, okay? This time wasn't your fault, and I know you're not a bad person. This is my home and I love lots of the people here. That—that means you, too, and I know you'll find lots of people here who'll love you back.

I do not like war either, dearest. And I do not want to fight here, I promise you that.

[And he finds it strange that those words are true. But there's no reason to fight here, and many reasons to not.

He sighs and drops to his knees, then shifts to sit cross-legged on the floor, slumping a little.]

You know that sometimes we don't have a choice. We have to fight. But... I want to be able to fight for something whilst I am here. I want to fight for you, and for Ikki, because I love you both and it would destroy me to see you hurt.

[Loki gives her a small, sad smile.

There is no way Elicia can understand how foreign these words are from him.]

People do not often like me, Elicia. And that is all right. That is the way it has to be, sometimes, and you should not worry about it.

[His eyes are suspiciously watery.]

So long as you believe in me, I promise I will try hard to be worthy.

[His expression mars with concern. The irony in her action is not lost on him. Making a card for a villainous monster who had no scruples with taking the lives of so many others as long as it befit his purpose. Would she make cards for all of them? Even if Barton was reckless to do what he had done, there's no way he can think of Loki as a victim. Just no way.

He's silent for a moment, considering her. He has to be careful about this. Because the last thing he wants to do is cause her more heartache. But at the same time, he will absolutely keep her safe, no matter what it takes.

He owes her that as her hero. But really? It's so much more than that.]

Elicia. [Actual name. Now you know he's serious.] I have to tell you something about Loki. And it isn't something you're going to want to hear, but you have to promise me you'll remember--I'm trying to keep you safe. That's what heroes do. And keeping you safe--[after she'd stayed so close to his side to heal him with all she could, after she'd clung to him and cried herself to sleep in the wake of losing her family]--is very, very important to me.

... [He nods, grave and prepared.

She's scared of what he'll say. There are so many things he could tell her.

But she's silent, unquestioning save for the confusion in her eyes.]

[He picks up one of her crayons, and twists it between his fingers. Careful, careful as he proceeds, not wanting to scare her anymore than she's already been scared, but needing her to understand just how vital this is. How serious he's being.]

Every hero has someone they have to fight. A villain, you could say. Someone bad, who hurts people because they want to get their way. They claim they have their own reasons, but those reasons are wrong. That's why we have to become heroes in the first place. To stop them from hurting people and keep everyone safe.

[He thinks of the draft. Again. The way the General had been so purposeful, insisting in the justice of their cause as his forces slaughtered. And it occurs to him how Loki would likely find the conviction of the Third Party downright inspiring.]

In my world, Loki was that person. He tried to take over the world. And he hurt a lot of people in the process. We stopped him, but he came very close to beating us. [It's easy to admit to her.] He's a powerful magician, and he's very good at lying. Good at tricking people. And he's not someone you should make a card for. Because he could try to hurt you, too.

[And a thin note of exasperation seeps into his voice.]

Do you understand?

[She stomps her foot down, brow furrowed. No. You don't get to just say that after she knows what you did. She wants you to do good. Be good. But you weren't. You weren't and you have to accept that. War happens, but it's the people who have flawed reasons that make it worse. She can't articulate THAT feeling as well as she wants, but she'll try her damnedest.]

Listen, Mr. Loki, because this is... this is really important to me.

It doesn't matter if war happens sometimes, because you hurt people. You hurt lots of people. You weren't fighting for anything when you hurt those people. You weren't anything like a hero, or a good guy, and nothing got fixed by fighting, and nothing but awful, awful hurt and pain happened because you did those things.

[She looks down, clutching the flower's stem.]

You hurt people who were like me and Ikki, and like all the people I care about. You hurt them because you wanted them to do what you told them, and if I were there you would have hurt me, too, and that's all wrong. You were a bad guy. You did bad things, and you can't ever take that back for all those people you hurt.

[She's looking down, shaking, cheeks flushed.]

Just because you're unhappy with something doesn't mean you have to make everyone else unhappy.

But I wanna give you a chance, because even though you're a bad guy, it doesn't mean you're the baddest, and it doesn't mean you can't be good... You're not a monster like the kind I'm scared of in my closet when I'm sleeping. Evil people don't cry or give people flowers. So you gotta' make yourself better and learn from the things you did wrong, 'cuz 'til you do... you won't ever, ever be happy.

I wanna believe in you, Mr. Loki. Even if you might trick or lie sometimes, I really want to.

Okay?

Edited 2012-10-07 08:46 (UTC)

[She's deathly quiet through the entire explanation.

And then at the question, she nods. Maybe he can see how so many gears are turning in her head. How she's trying to make it all make sense, fit into her image of him, alter things—it's a lot to process, and she... she's not sure what to say.]

But... But he's been nice to me. He's been nice—

Why would he hurt people like that?

[Those are the words of Stark or Rogers, coming from her. It makes him angry, and it makes him tired. He doesn't have to justify himself to anyone, and he's sick unto death of the mortals acting as if he must.

Except he does have to justify himself here. Or he simply has to walk away and never look back. He's done that often enough.

Maybe this time, he doesn't want to.]

That isn't why at all.

[His voice is quiet. He puts his face in his hand.

It isn't, and it is. Because thinking of the mortals as having Elicia's face, she's right about some things. But it was still something he had to do. It was still one necessary move in the game. It was just easier when the mortals were little ants, or pieces on the board.

He doesn't know what to say, not really. Because it isn't like that, and it is. He is no hero, but he doesn't think of himself as the villain either. He is doing what he has to, which makes it infinitely uglier.

He fights the urge to laugh when Elicia says that he's not a monster like the one in her closet. That's far too close to the truth.]

No one's ever been sorry when they hurt me.

[He doesn't mean to say those words; they just come out, harsh and painful. Too childish. Too true. He scrubs at his face with his hand. He never wanted to be good, or bad. I only wanted to be your equal. He just wants to be himself.

And who is that, anyway?

With an effort, he composes himself.]

I don't like hurting people, dearest Elicia. I regret it. I'm not that sort of monster.

[He considers the crayon between his fingers carefully for a moment, before setting it down on the table and meeting her eyes with precision.]

Sometimes people who are bad--they're nice to people because they want those people to help them do bad things later. [But that's not all there was to it. Loki might be viewing his adult allies in the village as people he could use as pawns later, but he remember what Pepper had told him about her encounter with Loki at the art gallery. He'd practically admitted to being fond of children. And who could possibly want to hurt Elicia Hughes?

And yet. Tony had been a witness for so much pain she had gone through. He would put a stop to her going through any more.]

He hurt people because he wanted to rule my planet. He brought a whole army so he could try and defeat us and control us however he wanted.

Well, I'm sorry people hurt you, and I know a lot of people who'd be sorry, too. I really do, Mr. Loki. [She looks down, holding the flower close.] I don't think you're any kinda' monster, but... I don't know if you're tricking me or not. You're a magician, so... you'd be good at tricks.

I still don't understand... Why would...

B-but--but I don't think he would hurt me, Mr. Tony! Why did he help me when he didn't have to?? He got hurt, but he still made sure I was safe...

[He gives her a small, painful smile.]

I thank you, dear one, but you've never done anything to hurt me. You've nothing to be sorry for at all.

[He looks down, silent for a long time, then holds out his hand. He should not do this. But this is important. This isn't something he wants to lose.

He lacked conviction, on Midgard. Now, with his heart engaged, he has too much conviction, and perhaps too little sense. It's desperation that drives him. And maybe here, in this isolated space, it's all right.]

I know that it is hard to believe me. I do not blame you. But for this, I have a special trick. Give me your hand.

[With a movement of his fingers, he produces a small, smooth river stone from the air.]

[He's silent for a long moment before he reaches over to weight a reassuring hand on her shoulder.]

I don't think he would hurt you, either. [Loki's actions made that clear, as well as what he'd heard from Pepper. But still, saying it feels dangerous and reckless. But he's said it anyway.] But he might hurt other people you care about. Your big bro and big sis. Your friends. Me. And if he hurts people you care about, then he's not a good friend at all.

[She hesitates, but eventually does as he says.

She can't help but stare in awe at the magic, regardless of the circumstances.]

It's pretty... What—what is it for?

It's a magic stone. Don't move, I promise this will not hurt.

[He places it in her palm and curls her small fingers around it, then covers her hand with both of his. For a long moment he is silent, focused intently. The air feels heavy, that small bit of reality bending to his will. He frowns slightly, and speaks several guttural, commanding words in a low voice.

He releases her hand carefully. He's a bit paler now, dark circles around his eyes. Such a small thing took more effort than he likes, here, but he thinks that it will be worth the effort.]

It will only work for you, but it will tell you when anyone is lying, not just me. Shall we try it out? [He cocks his head and tries to smile.]

My name is Mani, and I am an elephant trainer. [If Elicia's holding the stone, there is a red aura around his head.]

My name is Loki, and I am a magician. [The aura turns green.]

Does it work?

Edited 2012-10-10 11:54 (UTC)

I... I won't let him hurt any of you! I'll make him not hurt you!

[That's gotta be something, right? It has to be something that can work, right?

Anything that'd work. Her mind is making ideal ways to counteract this, so that nobody gets hurt; there surely must be a scenario that works...]

You won't be able to make him do anything. You can ask him to be nice all you want, but the only one who can make that call is Loki himself.

I know it doesn't sound fair, and he's been nice to you. But he's a very bad person. And he could do very bad things here. I want to keep you safe from that, so something like today doesn't have to happen ever again.

Y... Yeah. Yeah, it does.

[She clutches the stone tightly in her hand, looking up at him. And then, after just a moment's hesitation, she steps forward and carefully hugs him.]

I know things will get better. Okay?

[He hesitates for a moment, then wraps his good arm around her, chin resting against his shoulder.]

I am sorry, dearest. I am truly sorry.

[He's not even certain what he's sorry for, but in this moment it's true. Everything hurts.]

... I understand... [Even if she's not sure about anything, she understands.] And I know you just wanna make sure I'm safe.

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♥ Appointments Post ♥

[Action, September 25]

[action, september twenty-fifth] would you like tummyache kicks with that

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